For some weeks now, I have avoided talking about relationships because I feel I am no expert, but recent events have brought it to my consciousness and I just feel I should add my voice.
In every relationship, either of two things is bound to happen, you guys may go all the way, or you guys may break up at some point. The latter I detest but I have recently seen/heard of so many break up stories all within a short period of time. Some even from couples I didn’t expect to break up, usually for some ‘crazy’ reasons, so I guess I have to get used it.
One thing I realized is that most people go into relationships because there is a need for it and then they get attached to the relationship (probably because of what they get from it) and not the person involved.
This trend is common because of the overwhelming desire to be in a relationship which makes the boy/girl (usually the girl) desperate (and most times confused). And that’s why it so easy to have as many guys/girls (obviously for different purposes) as you may wish.
I feel a relationship is supposed to be about the person you are in it with. We should try to desire the person a little bit more than the relationship itself, I feel this will improve bonding and make break ups more difficult. Most times when people (usually the girl) ‘cry’ about breakups, I wonder if it is the relationship they cry so much for when lost, or the person in it?
This brings me back to the topic of why we go into relationships in the first place. Everyone is meant to love and be loved, but not everyone knows how to love, who to love & what love is. Some force themselves and just jump into the arms of wrong people claiming it to be love, but they forget that the same way they rush in, they can be flushed out..
I don’t think it makes sense to rush in, giving your whole heart and body to someone. I feel we should take time out to check the other person ‘well well’, know them and their goals in life as well as for the relationship. Their persistent approach to you will give you a little more knowledge about them.
I will still emphasize being friends before lovers! For it is hard to find a friend in a lover when you fall too quickly for them. It is the friendship that will hold the relationship when every other thing wears off.
So, the message this week is:
Take your time before going into loving anybody. It pays to be patient a bit (although under some other circumstances it may not).